#TheSitDown

You know, life is funny, you think something is gone for good and then bam! Like it never left, it's right back in your life 150% and for whatever reason you welcome it back with open arms completely forgetting any problems you had in the past. A girl? No. Fuck that. I'm talking about sneakers, and I'm not talking about my interest in buying, selling and trading. I am talking about the sneaker community, or at least what was once a community. Now it's an every man for himself, I would rather see you fail than see you succeed, I'll take 5 and you take none, I am better and your collection sucks world.


But I remember a time where that was different. A time where opinion was valued whether you had 1 sneaker or all 1 of 1's. A time where you could show up to an event and enjoy a variety of sneakers from throughout generations, not just the Jordan brand or Nike flavor of the week.

Now all I see is a time where you could take away the visuals and you would just think it's a room full of dudes comparing dick sizes.

A few weeks ago that changed a bit for me. I tuned into The Sitdown for the first time, not for any reason other than I had the pleasure to grab lunch with Jay Corbin a few years back and besides being one of the most knowledgeable people about anything from NYC culture to sneakers he is just down right hilarious. So I said fuck it, I've been separated from this whole sneaker gimmick for long enough to tune in and give it a shot. Why not.

Now before I hit you with how I felt about the show. I need to point out one thing. A lot of people my age probably think Jay and Drew are old school heads with old school views, I don't disagree, I just think there's a time and a place for that. Oddly enough, this is their show. Their time. Their place. That simple.

What these two guys are doing is beyond that of any blog, online magazine, YouTube channel, YouTube magazine stream radio frequency bitmap trendy hype whatever the fuck you call it. This is it. No bullshit. No sugar coating. They aren't here to grow subscribers and have pairs seeded to them. This is not a gimmick to hopefully please someone at Nike. This is them being 100% real in a time where real does not exist. If you can't fuck with that, you are the problem.

I'm gonna cut this off right now because if I go on ranting I'll take up way more space than need be. In the future do yourself a favor, give em a retweet, tune in and share your opinion with these guys. Help build what was once a fun world that we lived in outside our daily lives. When you weren't ashamed to be "on of those guys standing outside footlocker".

Why not right?

- Guru

End of Guru? Here is why

To me, its odd that I am even at this point. I have said it the whole time, and it literally did not hit me until today. People always ask me how I have 2k+ followers on Twitter. A number that, lets be real, its nothing special, but its higher than your average "tweeter." For a long time, well, up until today really, I convinced myself that every single follower I had, followed me because they liked what I had to say. Today, I realized that it had nothing to do with it. Today I realized that it had everything to do with the name I was tweeting from, and thats why I am at the point I am at.

It literally all started as a joke. When I used to work at Traffik back in the day the owner Johnny came up with "The Shoe Guru" as a way to let people know I had some knowledge. The goal ultimately was to use it as a cool little marketing idea. Give people a chance to test their knowledge up against the Guru, honestly, it seemed like an amazing idea. Back then, I was so enthralled in the sneaker world it was insane. But it was different, I would get excited over simple stuff. A $200 pair of sneakers was a HUGE deal. I thought Tiffany dunks were the rarest sneaker of all time and that once I get them, if ever, that my life would be complete. An easier time, a time that gave me a lot of joy and happiness. I did not know any shop owners, I did not have any connects, it was me roughing it out 100%. I had to pay my dues of course, all with the goal of the ever illusive "hook up". If I could get in with dudes at a shop I would be set for life, it was just such a linear goal that it all made sense, so much motivation to complete that goal. Back then, I knew who I was, and I was okay with everything that I was about, cause it was simple and straightforward, I was about sneakers, sneakers were who I was.

Lately, things have changed a little bit. I became someone I dont know, someone that nobody knows, honestly because that person does not exist. I saw a television show once where a women pretended to be Anna Nicole Smith. Every day she would spend hours getting ready and walk through major cities pretending to be a celebrity, all for the joy of feeling accepted.

I could lie, but I won't. I am at the point where lies are not necessary and would only prolong the inevitable. The past 3 years, all I wanted to do was fit into this world that we call the Sneaker Community. I wanted to be someone. I wanted to make a name for myself. Some would say that I have, that I did just that. Me? I think I simply got lucky. Now I know a lot of you are probably saying "Well I met you, and you really are a cool dude." I guess I just have one question, if I was never living behind the name "The Sneaker Guru" would I have ever had the opportunity to meet you? I truly think that anyone could have done what I did, pick a catchy name and run with it. Thats what I feel like I have realized. I was simply living behind a name, a name that I did not even come up with, a name I can't even take credit for. It is definitely hard for me to say that, but at the end of the day, I know its the truth. You were not following Kyle Powers, you were following The Sneaker Guru.

I will say that I am extremely fortunate to have had the opportunity to live the life I have lived the past few years. I have certainly done a lot of things that most people may never get the chance to. What I am not proud of is that I could not do it at Kyle Powers, it was always as Guru.

At the end of the day this is a culmination of a lot of things. The outcome? I have sort of lost the love of sneakers that I once had. I lost the simplicity of it. I lost the excitement and motivation it gave me on a daily basis. I used to eat sleep and breath sneakers. Now? They are simply just a stack of boxes at the foot of my bed. Some carry personal meaning and I will always keep those as they are more than just leather and rubber to me. But for now, everything else is not something I want to be a part of. Maybe some day I will find that love that I once had. A love that at this point I cant say I see coming back in the near future. Maybe this time, I will find that love, and this time, I will do it as Kyle Powers, not as The Sneaker Guru.

Change of Pace

I wish my Mom read my blog. For me, this is where the real things I have going on in my head live. I guess part of me just wonders what she would think. Would she be proud? Would she question my thought process? I just feel as though there is a certain amount of positive and negative feeling that gets put into my posts. I also feel as though she would tell me to post more. Mostly because she probably wants to be able to keep up with my life. Well Mom, I will do my best!!

So this post is not about my Mother. As much as I love her and want to write a post about her, I am just not comfortable being able to put my thoughts on my Mother into words quite yet. Today, well today is dedicated to my current state in life.

Now I will let you know. Most of you did not know me when I was in High School. I am going to make this as simple as possible. If there was a superlative for least likely to succeed, I would have voted for myself. I was just one of those kids that never really cared about doing much, or focusing my strengths in any direction. I was interested in the cute girls and looking what I thought at the time to be fresh. I literally can not tell you how many teachers over the years told me I was a bright kid and all I needed to do was apply myself. That always stuck with me, the ability to NOT apply myself. Why would I? What good was High School doing for me. At the time, I didn't think it was doing much of anything for me. It was a place I wasted 7 hours a day thinking about random stuff. (I once made a whole town out of twisty ties, I swear some day that will benefit me. Definitely a skill.) So here I am, in what should be me going into my final semester of college. Unfortunately college never happened for me. I mean, unless you count those 2 months where I hung out in the campus lunch room (Sorry Mom.) The idea of classroom education just never sat well with me. So as some of you may or may not know, I am moving to California in a month. The kid who would never do anything with his life, is finally picking up shop and moving out west. The part that gets me, and literally the reason why I wrote this post is because I am going out there with numerous peoples support. I am, for the first time in my life, getting positive support from others believing that I will succeed. I know I know, this sounds so arrogant and cocky. I swear, that is not why I am writing this. I simply just have never felt like anyone other than my loving Mother has believed in me this way.

Well. I guess there is really only 1 thing left to do then. To everyone who supports my ideas and dreams. For anyone who has ever doubted these same things. This post is for you. This is my promise to each and every one of you that I will finally apply myself and squeeze myself of every bit of talent I have. I have never been this determined and motivated in my life. So thank you, thank you all for helping me get to where I am. This is literally the start of it all. I could not and will not do this without you. So thank you once again.

And Mom, eventually you will get your own post on here. I can promise that.

kPow

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I dont find titles to be pointless. I just find basing my writing off 4 words to be inaccurate and impossible. I could give you a title and by the end of my little vent session, it would be like "why is this titled that?" So I find that if I almost let you create your own title, by the end, there wont be confusion. Well, at least in regards to the title. I could say a million things over the next few moments that can confuse you, so I guess the title is the best part to start with clarity.

Clarity. Damn. What is clarity? The ability to see things clearly? The opacity of an object? The ability to see clearly either refers to a physical or mental understanding of something. At least, thats sort of how I view it. Now opacity is another whole subject. Your ability to see through something. Whether you can see perfectly through something or have a foggy view. Then perfect gets brought into the equation and it all becomes insanely unrealistic. Being able to see through something or completely not see through something, both complete opposites, both perfect in their own right.

Where am I going with this? I just explained my view on life to you. That is primarily how I see things. With no pun intended. The idea of clarity and understanding within life is impossible to gauge. Either way, there are things I just dont understand. See, this is where if I had given you a title you would start to get confused. Now trust me, at this point you probably are no longer reading this because you either go so confused you cancelled out, or your a damn trooper and want to see where I take this magical ride.

Well. Lately, I have been getting these damn curveballs in life and I dont know which way to swing. Sometimes, things can either be positive or negative, sometimes one situation brings upon both as options. Girls scare the shit out of me. Did I ever mention that? I do not get how they have the ability to take over my mind so much. I had a conversation with a good friend the other day about the idea of me and relationships. Now if you know me, you are going "2 weeks and its over, he has nothing to offer" and I do NOT blame you, that is my past and I am forced to live with it. However, I want more than that. Not just from girls, but from everything in my life. I am known for being one thing in life, above all else.

Inconsistent.

I have no problem saying that at all. I am one of the most inconsistent people you will ever meet up to this point in my life. When I am on, there is rarely anyone better than me. When I am off, which is often, well, I am not much of anything.

HOWEVER.

Lately, things have been turning around. Getting me to the point in my life where I break out of that shell......

Alright. Stop. Pause. Freeze.

Listen to me. If you listen to me only once in your life and you have made it this far, listen to what I am telling your RIGHT NOW.

Dont follow in my foot steps. The things I will do over the next year may be big, they may be small. Learn from me, but do not follow me. I am a leader, but I am not to be followed. The path I chose to get here was one that I wish upon nobody in this world. Be yourself. Dream BIG. But most of all, enjoy every single moment of it. I have missed opportunities in life, some that I think about on a constant basis. I mean hell, I let a girl move back to Chicago before I told her how I really felt. But again, thats a story for another time :).

At the end of the day. Stand up, walk to the closest mirror, take a look, and ask yourself if you are who you want to be. If the answer is no, then start over. Nothing should stop you from being the person you hoped and dreamed of being. I used to look in the mirror and dream of being someone else. Today? I look in the mirror and I smile. Not because I am happy of what I have become, but rather who I am going to become. Trust me when I say that nobody will ever judge you for following your heart, wherever that may lead you. You get one chance in this world, the people who love you the most will ALWAYS follow you. Wherever that may be. I tell you not to follow me, because I simply do not deserve your love and trust in my guidance. What I do deserve is the journey I must endure to get where I need to be.

Whether that is here or there, then or now. The world is a big place, somehow, not big enough.

See you soon.

Today. You knew me. Tomorrow. You will forever remember me.

Kyle